Offbeat Wedding Welcome & Opening Remarks: Examples for a Non-traditional Ceremony! When I get older losing my hairMany years from nowWill you still be sending me a ValentineBirthday greetings bottle of wineIf I'd been out 'til quarter to threeWould you lock the doorWill you still need me, will you still feed meWhen I'm sixty-fourYou'll be older tooAnd if you say the wordI could stay with youI could be handy, mending a fuseWhen your lights have goneYou can knit a sweater by the firesideSunday mornings go for a rideDoing the garden, digging the weedsWho could ask for moreWill you still need me, will you still feed meWhen I'm sixty-fourEvery summer we can rent a cottageIn the Isle of Wight, if it's not too dearWe shall scrimp and saveGrandchildren on your kneeVera, Chuck and DaveSend me a postcard, drop me a lineStating point of viewIndicate precisely what you mean to sayYours sincerely, wasting awayGive me your answer, fill in a formMine for evermoreWill you still need me, will you still feed meWhen I'm sixty-four. ", "Hi everyone, I'm (name), and I'd like to begin my speech with a quote from the great Seamus Heaney/Maya Angelou/Rev. May we all celebrate by being fully present during our short time together. Marriage is the clasping of hands, the blending of hearts, the union of two lives as one. But now they wish to extend that joy in a new affirmation, based not upon what they hope the future years will bring, but on what the past has already brought them and what they know of their future together. With this ring, I thee wed. Officiant: To make your relationship work will take love. It is out of the tension between separateness and union, that love, whose incredible strength is equal only to its incredible fragility, is born and reborn. Become a Wedding Officiant with Our Free Online Ordination! There was a light in her eyes that Id never seen before. I was a part of this life, and it is a part of me.. "Gosh, what an emotional day it's been. This is why we've written dozens of sample wedding ceremony scripts of all types and shared them in our Ceremony Script Library! One, who loves us, gives us a unique gift: a piece of ourselves, but a piece that only they could give us. Even though this is not possible, just speaking of it should assure BRIDE and GROOMthat our hearts are attuned to theirs in these moments so meaningful to all of us. Need inspiration? Love is the force that allows us to face fear and uncertainty with courage. They are elated that you could be here today for this joyous marriage celebration. "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my . Even the cake is in tiers!" 2. I hope you're all having a great night so far. Its the great unifier our one universal truth. A comedic ceremony script is a combination of wit, humor and some hard facts. If it were possible to begin this ceremony by gathering together all the wishes of happiness for BRIDE and GROOMfrom all present here . An intimate and secure relationship is not based on promises, but rather on trust, respect, faithfulness and the ability to forgive. Here are some funny wedding quotes written by famous authors that you can use to express the love and laughter at your wedding. You might wish to use a funny quotation for each main section e.g. You could make the vows or ring exchange wording funny. This is a celebration of the joining of two souls already attuned to each other. They watched the stick drift out of sight. But, of course, ceasing to be in love need not mean ceasing to love. That's a Homer Simpson quote, which should give you an idea of the caliber of speech you can expect from me tonight., Photo by Paula Gillespie Photography via One Fab Day, "Hello everyone, I'm (name.) Yes, the rumours are true, I will be debuting some new choreography on the dance floor this evening. A word on Opening Remarks So, usually, the above part happens - the "first thing we say to start the wedding ceremony" - before the processional where the person getting married comes down the aisle after his/her wedding party. Each one of you is an important piece in the story it tells. But marriage is a garden, which needs to be tended every day: the benefits we receive through marriage are not free. You have come here today, BRIDE and GROOM because you believe that by being together your lives will be better and more productive than they would be apart. Stay up to date with the latest wedding ceremony trends, script writing inspiration, tips and advice for first-time officiants, and news that matters to couples and wedding ministers. It is the joyous union of two people whose comradeship and mutual understanding have flowered in romance. A marriage between mature people is not an escape but a commitment shared by two individuals that becomes part of their commitment to themselves and society. A poem of comedy and marriage advice all mixed into one funny wedding ceremony reading. Green weddings are fun but emotional and somber with a charged atmosphere. The bride says: All Rights Reserved. With that, I think its time to let them speak about their love. Marital partners accept the challenges that living together in love offer. Embarking on a lifelong commitment with the person you love is a momentous occasion, but that doesnt mean its all serious business. To help you find what you're looking for, we've split our sample opening lines into three categories; simple and sincere opening lines, funny opening lines and opening lines with quotes from famous people. On this beautiful day, _______ and _______ have brought us together to celebrate their love and union in matrimony. The nervous and 2. "I promise to turn on the air conditioning when you're hoteven if I'm totally freezing." "I promise not to force you to watch a Gilmore Girls marathon." "I'm so happy I accepted your rose." "I vow to love you even when you're old and still playing Xbox". Invocation Welcome family and friends. But in this giving, remember to preserve yourself your integrity, your individuality. Daniel and Sara, please join hands, look at one another now and remember this moment in time. It is an all-consuming task, a lifelong endeavor the journey weve been preparing for all of our lives. In this ceremony today we will witness the joining of BRIDE and GROOM in marriage. This portrays heart and humor at for the wedding ceremony. Take a cue from our script samples above and shine on your day. A clever little poem about growing old together. ", "Hello everyone. I will love you in sickness and in health, as long as you take care of the vet visits. We gather here today to witness and celebrate an act of deep love. The ability and desire for one human being to love another is perhaps the most precious and fulfilling gift that has been entrusted to us. To be known in this way is a priceless thing. Today the two tribes are about to become one. Although you will disagree, remember to respect each others feelings, needs and wants. For what greater thing is there for two human souls than to feel that they are joined together to strengthen each other in all labor, to minister to each other in all sorrow, to share with each other in all gladness. Funny Wedding Vows for Her. Personalize your ceremony by selecting meaningful readings. Because theres no mention of culture, spirituality, or supreme beings. Thank you all for being here on such an exciting night. This marriage is a symbol of BRIDE and GROOMs commitment to that love. (Couple names), you should be really proud of the amazing day you've put together. The master and the student had arrived at the stream after walking the forest path for nearly two hours. Whatever may come I will always be there. I do. And that brings them here, a time to pause, look back, and smile at all the moments that brought them here. A feisty marriage poem that packs a punch. What does marriage mean to you? There are many different kinds of love, almost if not all of which are represented here today. One who loves us, gives us a unique gift: a piece of ourselves, but a piece that only they could give us. It is the finding of ones life by losing it. To be loved is to be seen, and known, as we are known to no other. We see beneath the surface, to the qualities, which make our beloved special and unique. (I do) It does not rejoice in the wrong, but rejoices in the right. ", "Good evening everyone. He was, after all, the only 6ft 2' student at (school name)! Funny Wedding Ceremony Script. All of us here today have our own love stories. But trying to describe love is one of our favorite pastimes. The Guests sit, and the bride enters. Do you promise not to whine at him/her when he/she forgets to take out the trash or pick up his clothes from the floor? "Well, in plain English," says the doctor, "you're just lazy.". Think of them with appreciation and gratitude. And what I wish for them on their wedding day is that their life together as a team is one of complete contentment; full of those moments that they wish would never end, and that they continue to make one another smile and laugh as they make each of us do. Love me when I'm old and shockingPeel off my elastic stockingsSwing me from the chandeliersLet's be randy bad old dears.Push around my chromed Bath ChairLet me tease your white chest hairScaring children, swapping denturesLet us have some great adventures.Take me to your special placesWatching all the puzzled facesYou in shorts and socks and sandalsMe with warts and huge love-handles.As the need for loveenthrallsWrestle with my damp proof smallsMake me laugh without constraintBuy me chocolate body paint.Hold me safe throughout the nightWhen my hair has turned to whiteBelieve me when I say it's trueI've waited all my life for you. And every step of the way the master only listened. Super Simple (and Short) Civil Ceremony. For instance "I honor you with this ring as a sign of my love" Friends and family, I now present to you the newly married couple. This version checks all the legal boxes while maintaining a light and fun tone throughout. Youre standing in front of a crowd of well-dressed guests, about to perform your very first wedding ceremony. A funny wedding ceremony script can turn your day into one that is so unforgettable. He noted the paths of leaves, the surge of bubbles, and the sway and drift of weeds growing on the bottom, until he was sure. [I do.]. Add a little laughter to your nuptials with one of these funny wedding ceremony readings, from children's books, movies, poems, and more. She worried that ______ didnt feel the same connection she felt. In this ceremony today we will witness the joining GROOM/BRIDE and GROOM/BRIDE in marriage. And it will take commitment, to hold true to the journey you both have pledged to today. Sections inbold are in traditional ceremonies. Only the two of you will know what marriage exists between you the outer forms are only signs and covers over the love of your hearts. We who partake of this occasion bind ourselves as witnesses to the journey of love that they are undertaking here. Love is one of the highest experiences that we human beings can have and it can add depth of meaning to our lives. If the old fairy-tale ending and they lived happily ever after. is taken to mean They felt for the next fifty years exactly as they felt the day before they were married, then it says what probably never was nor ever would be true, and would be highly undesirable if it were. It is the ultimate commitment to love, share, trust and grow with another person. Take a moment to recall the special people who make up your tribe. To give ourselves in love is not to give ourselves away. We would like to welcome all of you, honored guests, and thank you for being with us today. Big ones like saying I love you, moving in together, getting engaged but mostly a million little ones that come in between the big moments. To see with loving eyes, is to know inner beauty. This is a wonderful thing for you, since you may never have a better opportunity to develop connections with so many good people. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. If I could just say a few words Id be a better public speaker! We discover the truest guideline to our quest when we realize love in all its magnitudes. Today we have come together to witness the joining of these two lives. Why this moment? It is, ultimately, the emergence of the Highest Selves of each person. And if you're writing your own vows, you'd have to prepare a wedding ceremony script with vows. Handy one-liners to get your speech off to an amazing start! Through their marriage they do not leave those things behind, but instead form a new family that will broaden the circle of love and understanding in the world. They will laugh and cry, dance and sing, and above all, celebrate their love with the blessings of the people who matter most to them. We have thousands of important moments that happen throughout our lives, but this one is regarded as one so critical, we acknowledge its special status by sharing it with others. I will trust you and honor you I truly cant think of a better venue than _________ [paradise for a destination wedding, this beautiful church for a more religious affair, etc.] Begin typing to search, use arrow keys to navigate. Loving someone is a reason to stretch beyond our limits, to become more for the sake of the other. Marriage is a symbol of the commitment to create a lifelong partnership based on love. I require and charge you both, here in the presence of God, that if either of you know any reason shy you may not be united in marriage lawfully, and in accordance with Gods Word, you do now confess it. And even though we describe love in different ways and even though love can look different from one person to the next we all know it when we see it. Selecting funny wedding ceremony readings is an opportunity to showcase both of your personalities while putting a smile on all your guests faces. The way I see it, marriage is like my old car.When I bought it new from the dealership,everyone around me was saying; Wow thats a nice car!It was all bright and shiny and worthy of admiration.And then as the years went bythere were places where the paint was starting to peel off.It got a little dent and a scratch or two here and thereand once it was over a decade oldPeople started saying; Why are you still driving that old thing?But my car ran like a top and would never leave me high and dry.Every time something sounded a little off, or needed attention,I got to work on it and fixed whatever needed fixing immediately,knowing that you get what you give.And then, when she became a classic,it was off to the body shop she went for a new paint job.People once again began saying; Wow, thats a really nice car!But what they didnt know was that all the things that really matter,were always things that nobody could see from the outside.A marriage is like my old car.Its the maintenance you do between the high of the wedding day,and gaining the admiration your grandchildrenby being the couple who still laughs and shares secrets,and still holds hands after all these years.So dont worry so much about what people think or say.Just do your oil changes, keep up with your maintenance,get out and have fun,dont be afraid to blow the dust off now and then,and fix whatever breaks as soon as it happens.This is my advice for a marriagethat will motor successfully on down the highway of life. The Opening Words and Introduction of the wedding ceremony sets the tone for the wedding. So I give you my life to keep. And here they are! Dearly beloved and honored guests: Additionally, as they honor one another in memory of the years already shared, the family now grown, and the joys and hardships together endured, they wish to pledge their love anew. Here's how to get started. Dear family and friends we have gathered here today to joyfully acknowledge the wedding of BRIDE and GROOM. And with the onset of the quiet days of winter when words are no longer necessary, the love that they have cultivated and harvested with such care will sustain them for always. What marriage is about is what life is about growth. Why are you getting married and why now? I like you a lotYoure funny and kindSo let me explainWhat I have in mind.I want to be Your Personal PenguinI want to walk right by your sideI want to be Your Personal PenguinI want to travel with you far and wide.Wherever you go, Ill go there tooHere and there and evrywhereAnd always with you.I want to be Your Personal PenguinFrom now on.Now lots of other penguins seem to do fineIn a universe of nothing but iceBut if I could be yours and you could be mineA cozy little world would be twice as nice.I want to be Your Personal PenguinI want to talk with you night and dayI want to be Your Personal PenguinI want to listen to whatever you say.Look at these wings, so perfect to hold youId like to say againWhat I have already told youLet me be Your Personal PenguinFrom now on.Now lots of other penguins seem to do fineIn a universe of nothing but iceBut if I could be yours and you could be mineA cozy little world would be twice as nice.I want to be (want to be) Your Personal PenguinI want to walk right by your sideI want to be (want to be) Your Personal PenguinI want to travel with you far and wide.Wherever you go, Ill go there tooHere and there and evrywhereAnd always with you.I want to be Your Personal PenguinImagine me, Your Personal PenguinI want to be Your Personal PenguinFrom now on.